. . . Ronald Rump is clearly winning. Martha Stewpot, furry readers will remember, had her own reality television show which went off the air due to lackluster ratings. Ronald Rump's reality television show, while losing viewers by the second, is still on the air. Therefore, Ronald Rump is still rich and famous while Martha Stewpot is merely, well, rich and famous.

This Morning Hairball reporter can't do it. She just can't do it. She was all set to write a story about how Martha Stewpot was a loser because her television show was off the air, but face it: at least she's been the star of her own television show. That's the dream of so many felines: being the star of a television show. Who wouldn't give both of their right paws to have everyfur, all around the world, watching her beautiful visage on television and envying her, and collecting an astronomically high paycheck every week at the same time?

Okay, this Morning Hairball reporter will admit it. Martha Stewpot is her idol, even though, technically, she is an ex-felon and her following probably likes Ronald Rump's television show far better than they liked hers, even though Ronald Rump's television show is pretty stinky as well. If, say, Martha Stewpot offered an exclusive interview tot his Morning Hairball reporter, the offer would be graciously accepted -- particularly, if the offer came with the opportunity to appear as a special guest star on any of Martha Stewpot's upcoming television programs.

It's hard for this Morning Hairball to stay objective when she is so beautiful and talented and hasn't yet had her shot at the bigtime which she so richly deserves.